I get quite a few emails each day, quite a few. Recently though I have been noticing that no one has been emailing me back. I will get new emails, but none that are responding to an email I have sent. I thought I had pissed the internet off at first. But today the realization hit me like a meteor falling from the sky. The filter I had created to prevent Spam from hitting my IN box was actually preventing more than Spam from hitting. I am being spammed by emails with Re: Viagra” in the subject line. I created a filter to send them directly to the trash bin – do not pass Go, do not collect $200. With 30 minutes they were back, only this time they had changed the subject line to “Re: Vlagra”. I added yet another filter. Within minutes they hit again, once again changing one letter of the subject line. So I got them good, I added a filter which deleted anything with :Re:” in the subject line. Not my finest moment. I guess I didn’t think that one through too clearly. Anyway, now it’s fixed so if I haven’t responded to your email you may want to send it again because the last one probably went in the trash bin. Damn spammers!

Dogs and Kotex do not mix. Poor Chloe is still in heat and bleeding like a stuck pig. The duty of changing her kotex has somehow fallen to the G-man. It’s a rather sick sight to see a man changing a doggies bloody kotex. But I have to say, I’m glad it’s not my changing the thing. And besides, he is so good at it. Our dog Moose on the other hand is a dirty old man. I caught him nudging Chloe’s panties off yesterday with his nose. He got them completely down to her ankles. Nasty pervert! It’s a good thing Chloe doesn’t wear a bra or he’s figure out a way to unhook that one too. By the way, does anyone know how long dogs stay in heat? She has been in heat since the 18th we figure. The poor thing shakes like a leaf when we put her panties and kotex on. She absolutely hates wearing them. But what are you going to do when your dog bleeds as much as a woman at that time of the month. I tell you, it is absolutely disgusting! We all wish it were over… except Moose.

Don’t ever get sick around Lil Miss’s mother or she’ll let you know it. I got a voice mail from her yesterday on the cell phone. She was furious! She screamed into the phone “I just want to let you know that YOUR SON IS SICK! He has a cold and Lil Miss spent the weekend with him this weekend and HE WAS SICK! Now she has come home from school with the sniffles. I am taking away all of his visitation privileges for a week because of this, but you can have visitation if you want.” Now what’s wrong with this picture? First off he has 50% custody so I don’t think she can take away “visitation”. Secondly I never slept with her and created a baby so why am I involved in “visitation”? If Lil Miss wants to come over here she is welcome at any time and even has her own room here full of her toys and her clothes. But I am a “Gwanma” NOT a parent so don’t involve me in this “visitation” bullshit. And thirdly, since when is it a crime to catch a cold? How dare he get sick. That woman really needs to get a clue! As for Lil Miss? She is coming over after school this afternoon for “visitation”.

And in other “Daisy-ville” news, we are gearing up for another crisis. This morning when I jumped in the shower I noticed there was hardly any water pressure. And when I washed the dishes after my morning waffle I noticed once again that the water pressure was practically nil. And right now the G-man is in the kitchen washing up his lunch dishes before he goes back to the office and he just commented that there is hardly any water pressure at all. Ah, life in Daisy-ville, just one crisis after another. Welcome to our moneypit home.

And one final word. (Don’t read this Brooklyn). Please take a moment today and say a little prayer for Soldier Boy and all the rest of the brave men and women fighting for our country. I saw on yahoo news today that the number of American troops killed in Iraq in October reached the highest monthly total in nearly two years today. That’s not what you want to be reading when your son in law is deployed over there.