Lil Miss had a partial day of school today. The kids were released at 10:50am so they could torture their parents, grandparents or caregivers. The first thing we did was to go out to lunch. The only good thing I can really say about lunch is that the ketchup was good and it wasn’t McDonalds.
After lunch Lil Miss wanted to go shopping. She wasn’t quite sure what she wanted to go shopping for, but she knew she wanted to go shopping. I hadn’t had enough caffeine yet so I agreed. Lack of caffeine can be a serious hazard, do not try this at home folks.
After wandering through the toy aisles for close to an hour Lil Miss reveals her true shopping obsession – high heeled shoes. This is funny is so many ways because her Auntie Brooklyn started with a shoe obsession when she was 5 just like Lil Miss. And the scary thing is it never went away, it only grew in obsession. Lil Miss is like her Auntie Brooklyn in so many ways that you would almost think Lil Miss was her daughter. Anyway, I didn’t end up letting her have high heeled shoes (because they had none in her size) so we went with some platform Bratz sandals. She was happy and I was broke, so all was well with the universe. Okay, maybe I wasn’t broke…yet.
After our shopping expedition Lil Miss decided she would take my SUV for a spin around the block. She did so well that I went out and had her a set of keys made so she can drive it at will. She was even prouder to tell me that she didn’t “goose” even once. Seeing my puzzled expression she explained that “goosing” is when you take a corner too fast. Hmmm…goosing used to mean something entirely different when I was her age.
Now here is where it gets sad. When we get home from shopping she calls her best friend as they have made plans to spend the afternoon together playing. Lil Miss wants them to play at my house. Her friend wants them to play at her house. Lil Miss usually gives in and plays at her friends house but this time she was fighting for equality and wasn’t backing down. So her friend yelled at her and said she wasn’t going to be her friend anymore and then hung up on her. Lil Miss broke out in crocodile tears. It was enough to break your heart. I cradled her in my arms and rocked her for half an hour until she was calm. I told her that her friend was probably crying her eyes out as well. And here is where I get pissed off. She tells me that she heard her friends mother in the background saying “Tell her not to call here anymore and just hang up on her”. What kind of a mother escalates an argument between 2 five year old girls? A bitch, that’s what! After I reassured Lil Miss that it would all work out I pulled her out of her sadness by taking her across the street to feed the horse carrots. She has this firm belief that the elderly man who owns the horse and mule is going to die from old age and give the horse to her. So she is pretty much taking ownership of the horse in her mind already. It cheered her up though so that made me happy.
Our next activity (after watching Sponge Bob Squarepants while we colored and then playing memory cards and then playing school) was to play dolls. We played dress shop and all the dolls went shopping (naked of course) for new frocks. That was good for another 30 minutes, then it was onto the next activity.
After the dolls we played outside until her daddy came. I cannot tell you how happy I was to see her daddy arrive. This was one of the longest days of my life! I may be smiling in the picture above but let me assure you, I was sleeping inside! What I wouldn’t have given for a nap today.
And what’s the meaning of hell? Lack of DSL! My DSL has been down all day due to some horrible problem that SBC is experiencing. (You thought I was going to say the school kids having a partial day of school didn’t you? Well, I did think about it.)
