Welcome to hell week. Actually the next 2 weeks are going to be hell week in our household. Things have gotten off to a rousing start already. You see I have agreed to pet sit for my eldest son who is out of town on business for the next 2 weeks. So I have a 3 month old puppy and a rabbit in my house along with our own dog, Moose. The problem with that is our 9 year old dog is getting jealous in his old age. Take for instance this morning. G-man is on the computer and both dogs are playing nicely for a change. All of a sudden our dog walks over to one of the recliners, cocks his leg and starts pissing on my recliner! G-man threw him outside pretty quick. He didn’t say much but the look said it all. In fact I don’t think G-man wanted to come home from work tonight. I don’t blame him much as I didn’t want to be here with this zoo either. G-man works a couple blocks from our home so he normally comes home for lunch each day. Today when G-man came home for lunch he played with Babs the rabbit for awhile. About an hour after he went back to work he called me and asked me to bring him some benadryl ASAP. Seems that G-man is allergic to rabbits. His neck and chest had huge red welts all over. Sounds like I’ll be stuck cleaning the rabbit cage by myself.



I like my eldest son’s puppy. She likes me too. She slept next to me last night. She still has that sweet puppy smell. Do you know the smell I am talking about? She is half shar-pei and half pit bull. A scary mix I know, but she is so sweet. Her name is Chloe but they have taken to calling her “Squarehead” now because her head is square. Honestly it is, just look at her picture! When I hear them say “Squarehead” I automatically think of Sponge Bob Squarepants. You can tell I have a young one around can’t you? Chloe ran out of the front door this evening when Lil Miss’s mother came to pick her up so without thinking I yelled “Sponge Bob get back here!” Lil Miss and her mother looked at me oddly and said “Who are you talking to?” I played it off.

And speaking of Lil Miss, since my eldest son has joint custody of her and therefore has her 50% of the time, guess who gets to watch her 50% of the time while he is gone? Yup, me. And to make matters worse there is no school this week after today’s half day. It’s going to be a long week! After I picked her up from school I offered to take her out to lunch to celebrate fall break. She said she wanted to go out for Chinese food. Now I’ll tell you right now that Chinese food is probably my favorite all-time food and it’s because I like to eat with chopsticks. You could give me sea cucumber and if I had chopsticks I would eat it. I say that because I did. I don’t recommend sea cucumber. By the way, it is NOT a vegetable. Google it, you’ll be sick to think I ate it. I digress though. The point is, she wanted Chinese food so that is where we went. The waitress tried to talk to her so Lil Miss gets shy and crawls under the table. A major embarrassment because I go to that place a lot and know all of the servers quite well. Her food comes and she drinks a cup of tea, takes 2 spoons of soup and 1 bite of steamed rice. Didn’t even touch her cashew chicken. Refused to eat anything else and sat under the table because she was afraid the waitress would come back and say hello to her or something hideous like that. I couldn’t eat in those conditions. So I just had the gal wrap it all up to go. A lesson was learned though. Don’t listen to the dining recommendations of a 5 year old because they don’t want to eat anyway. They are only in it for the happy meal toy.

Lil Miss told me a story over lunch about a boy in her class named Chris. Now I am mentioning this because I am curious to see how she feels about him in another 7 years. And who knows, with our families luck she’ll probably end up marrying him and I will have this blog entry to read at the wedding. Here is the story, today at recess Chris told Lil Miss that he ate poop. He says that his mother doesn’t know that he ate poop and she would be mad if she found out but he likes the taste of poop and he is going to keep eating poop. Now I seriously doubt that a 5 year old boy is eating poop. My guess is that he likes Lil Miss and in typical little boy fashion doesn’t know how to show her that he likes her. So instead he acts annoying and tells outlandish stories. Although I must say telling someone that you eat poop is way out there. I wonder what his breath smells like.

In the afternoon Lil Miss and I went over to her Dads house to pick up one of her bikes so she could ride it while she is at my house for the next couple of weeks. We also gathered a ton of Barbie’s and assorted clothing items for them. We are in my son’s living room looking through his DVDs and a male voice suddenly booms out and says “What the hell are you doing in here?” This dude was pissed. Well I’m a woman and subject to PMS so even the strongest and bravest of men don’t frighten me. Although I may frighten them at certain times of the month if you know what I mean. So I yell back “This is my son’s house and I have a key and a handgun, which one should I use?” The guy backed down real quick and got very embarrassed. He was my son’s friend and was there to feed the fish. My son didn’t tell him that I have a key or what my car looks like. He kept apologizing all over himself after he found out who I was. I think he thought I was Lil Miss’s mother or her other grandmother or something. And he thought I was trying to steal stuff so he was going to put a stop to that. It’s a good thing that my son has friends like that who do such a good job watching his house but it’s an even better thing that I was lying about owning or using a handgun. Don’t tell my father this because he would probably disown me, but I don’t have a handgun and I don’t want one. Sorry Dad, I know that goes against the family values but what can I say.

Now if you will excuse me, it’s been a long day and I am wiped out. There is so much more to tell and the mind is willing but the body isn’t. If I thought today was bad, tomorrow will be even worse. Lil Miss will arrive at 8:30 tomorrow morning. I’m normally just starting my 2nd cup of coffee at 8:30am and everyone knows I’m not worth being around until I’ve had at least 4 cups of coffee. So it’s early bed for me. Ta!