For today’s picture I am posting a picture of one of G-man’s grills in honor of Margaret who posted a picture of hers. Only I don’t think I could get Lil Miss on the grill grates. She wouldn’t sit still long enough. Hamburgers it will have to be then. This is his gas grill. He also has a Weber Kettle grill, Weber Smoky Mountain (WSM) and a Brinkman Smoker (ECB). He is a grill/smoker addict I would say. And he is thinking about getting another one too. Good grief Charlie Brown!

There are some things in this world that people were not meant to see and my self proclaimed faith healer neighbor in a see-through shortie nightie is one of those things. If you will remember, she is a hillbilly. Now there are 2 types of hillbilly. One is the skinny as a rail hillbilly that usually has 2 teeth in their head and a corncob pipe hanging out their mouth. The other type is the beached whale variety also know as the corn fed heifer look. My neighbor is of the beached whale variety. So this morning as G-man was leaving for work I heard him give a gasp and literally fall against the door in shock and disgust. He was barely able to get the words out. I looked and I saw it too. NOOOOooooo…..The neighbor in her front yard, gardening, silhouetted against the morning sun in a see thru shortie nightie with no undergarments clothes on. I should have taken a picture so you could have been disgusted too. We were both ill at that point. It was even too disgusting to laugh at. Folks, I am talking nasty like you’ve never seen. When you look up the word “nasty” in the dictionary you will see a picture of her in a nightie. I hope we didn’t damage our retinas. Damn you hillbilly woman, we’re blind now! AARRRRUGGHHHHHH!!!!!!!……

In other news, my husband thinks I am the coolest. I am probably the only woman you know that tells her husband to go and look at ho’s. Oh yes I did! Last night at dinner I asked the G-man to do me a favor and go look at some Ho’s after we ate. I told him he needed a Ho and he should get himself a Ho. He says I rock. Okay, it was a garden Hoe, but it was a hoe nonetheless. And it sure gave the teenagers at the table next to us something to giggle at (eeeeuuuwww, those old people at that table said Ho). And he did get himself a nice hot little red Ho. That man knows what he likes in a Ho.

I am officially a grandma now. Three weeks ago my eldest went for a paternity test with his daughter, Lil Miss. It’s about time, I mean she’s 4 ½ now. They should have done this 4 ½ years ago. It didn’t matter what the result was because at this point no matter what blood tests say she is my granddaughter and my eldest son’s daughter. But fortunately the tests agree and she is officially in our blood line. Hurray! We are all very happy and relieved about it. Now this makes my eldest her father legally and that is a good thing.

I guess the holy roller self proclaimed faith healer neighbor is van-less now. I’ve mentioned before that her mother bought them the mini-van (and their house). We noticed a little over a week ago that her van wasn’t there. They are really hard on vehicles and it is always in the shop so I assumed that was the case this time. Nope, seems she has really fried it now. She blew the engine in it now. So she is out of luck. No van and no money to replace it. What does she expect the way she drives that thing. She would pull out of the driveway and stomp the gas pedal so she was going 60 by the time she hit the stop sign. And then she would slam on the brakes almost in a skid. Keep in mind that there is only 1 house between her and the stop sign so that’s pretty close. And her husbands van is going up now too. She said they are going to have to dump it because the brakes are going bad. That is the point where normal people would get a brake job on the vehicle. Oh well, to each his own I say.

I bloody well did it again. Yup, I rode topless again today. I am a fried tomato at this point. Just call me Injun Daisy. My arms and the top of my poor little old head are beet red. I can’t help it, I love it driving around with the top down. Sometimes when I don’t have errands to run I will just drive around the neighborhood with the top down, listening to tunes on the crappy radio with the crappy stock speakers that come in a Tracker. I needed to get a lot of topless driving in today because they are calling for rain tonight and it is not supposed to stop until Friday. Blah.

Speaking of cars, my mom informed me that she finally decided on a new car and purchased it. Remember how she was looking at the mini-coopers? No, she didn’t get one of those, so my brother and I won’t be splitting insurance money if she gets in an accident. She got something a little bit larger and sturdier. Actually anything would have been larger and sturdier than a Cooper wouldn’t it? Anyway, she ended up getting a Sebring. Congrats Mommy, I think you made a good choice. Now when can I drive it?

Off to the kitchen with me. My eldest and Lil Miss are coming for dinner tonight so I need to chain myself to the stove. I am making a roast beef, beefy mushroom sauce with baby portabella mushrooms and a good merlot, mashed potatoes, fresh green beans, sour dough rolls and a lemon meringue pie. Okay, so I secretly enjoy cooking. Don’t tell anyone. I have a non-cooking image to protect. Happy eatin’!